Sunday, April 25, 2010

Keeping You in Stitches

Stitches. I can't believe that Brett made it past his 5th birthday before he finally ended up needing stitches. His nickname is Crash...I guess that alone should explain it all. He is always crashing and running into everything. He's always been a tough kid. When he was just barely two he got West Nile Virus that turned into spinal meningitis. Just to hear that they thought that it could be bacterial meningitis made my heart melt. Luckily it wasn't, it was viral and he was better in a few days. He's struggled with food allergies since he was one so he's no stranger to difficulties.
But tonight to see him getting 5 stitches in his face, made me want to pass out. I thought that I was stronger than that but I got weak and nauseous and and had to sit. I know that this is the first of many trips to the ER with this child of mine and I hope that I can be a little stronger for him next time. I was very proud that he didn't cry. He did grimace a little and I will neither confirm nor deny if a tear was shed but I can tell you that he was tough and I LOVE him for that. His only worry was that the kids at preschool are going to tease him but I reassured him that they wouldn't. I talked to his teacher tonight, Miss Lacy, and she said to tell him that chicks dig scars. I LOVE Miss Lacy!! She always knows just what to say! lol

Possibly Misdiagnosed???

For the last two weeks we've been struggling with Tyler's BS's. No matter what we seem to have done, he is dipping frightfully low. With the increases of his activity level, we have been unable to keep up. And even more frightening, my husband and son were convinced that he had been misdiagnosed. I couldn't wrap my mind around it. Could it possibly be true? Could my son be misdiagnosed and now we needed to save his life by taking him OFF insulin. Scary enough my husband do it. And for awhile we were successful in keeping his levels balanced with exercise and food without the use of quick acting Humalog. I did however keep him on his Lantus. I just couldn't quite quit the entire thing. But, however, our dreams and hopes were crushed when BS just didn't stay the same. He eventually went crazy high and we started to give him his Humalog again. And crazy thing of all, the tears started to flow again. I just couldn't believe that I could let myself believe that he could mysteriously be cured.
As I've watched him slowly come out of his honey moon stage, I can't help but think back to our life before D. Our careless family fun nights of candy and soda. I miss our eating late and unscheduled. I think of Tyler's life in the future and what it holds. Too bad it's not a life without D. I only hopes he knows that it should never stop him from doing anything and everything he wants to do.

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Craziness

Had a wonderful weekend with my family. My parents came to stay for two days and we sure enjoyed seeing them. They even "escorted" us to church. Apparently they feel that we can't find it on our own...weird.
Any-shmays...We finally found a house that Dan and I can both agree on. It's right out where we've wanted to be and the best part is this house ISN'T in foreclosure! LOL! Our other one we were working on was just getting ridiculous! We started working on that house last October but when we saw this one drop price we jumped on it. We just couldn't resist. It was hard to walk away from the other one but this one was just too perfect. Dan then surprised me by taking me back to the furniture store where I had spotted the dining room table of my dreams. It had a big "sold" sign on it and I broke down in tears thinking someone else had bought it. But he had bought it over the phone and they're gonna hold onto it til we close on the 19th. I look forward to the kids being able to ride their 4 wheelers all over our property and to finally get their horse and cow that they've wanted since they were toddlers.
Things are just going really well right now and I feel like things might actually be getting better. It's been hard to be positive since Tyler's diagnosis but it truly isn't the end of the world and it is now just normal for us. As much as I enjoyed our privacy, having to let others know about Tyler's condition hasn't been so bad. I actually saw a man dosing with his pump at Wendy's and giggled cause Dan and I knew what he was doing. We wanted to rush over and tell him about Tyler and talk "D" but we didn't. I feel almost like we are in an exclusive club that not many have the "right stuff" to join!!! hahaha..not really but it's fun to think of it that way sometimes.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

chanting "Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!

No I don't live in a fantasy land of gum drops and chocolate flowing rivers, where my husband is a prince and I his princess. I live a very real life. I wish that I could say that Dan and I only "disagree" and that we never fight but I'd be a liar!! That man can make me go from happy to infuriated in about 3.2 seconds!! I know it's probably not protocol to talk bad about your husband but that man made me mad yesterday and now I can't sleep. He left yesterday for work. He's working in a town about 2 hours away. Before he left, I spent my morning with him and ran errands with him and went to lunch with him all because I knew that it would make him happy. I would've loved to enjoy a half day to myself getting caught up on one of my many list of things that I have to get done in order to more fully run my home. And yesterday when he called at 5:15pm to tell me that he forgot a CD on top of his dresser and to drop it in the mail so he could fix his friends computer-cause he never puts anything away- I happily ran back inside and said yes I would do it after I dropped our daughter off at ballet class. I ran back across town to an alternative site that takes postal mail after regular hours -it's in an Ace hardware. Random. I know...it's Wyoming. I had to buy4 bubble envelopes, even though I only needed one, but that's how they're packaged. There really wasn't any other choice. And that man had the nerve to yell at me over the phone and refused to give me the address and then on top of that, wanted me to go to another store to purchase different envelopes. I had my two boys with me and needed to get my daughter in 20 minutes by this time. I was so mad that I whispered to him, "Give me the damn address". Harsh, yes. Inappropriate, yes. Mean, yes. But you know what...I could have said a LOT worse and in a loud voice. And then he has to nerve to try to call me all night and be nice.
Needless to say I hung up on him every time. What a jerk. Who does he think he is? I have enough on my plate and I know Dr. Laura would be all over me and tell me what a terrible wife I am and I'm sure you're thinking I am, too. But I already know that. I do. But this is my blog and my life and I need to vent. I wish I was like all these ladies on here with helpful kids and a loving husband but that isn't my everyday. I'm on my own most of the time and I'm okay with that. I don't mind when people throw a wrench in my chain. I love to help others. Just don't make demands and then have the nerve to be ungrateful when I do it at my own pace. And then wonder why I'm not wearing a smile on my face while doing it.
Moving our family to Rock Springs was his idea. That's where his business is and we were spending a fortune in fuel every month for him to come home every weekend. I wanted to stay in Riverton where we've lived for 8 years. That's home to me. But I moved with a smile on my face and tears running down my cheeks because I wanted our family to be together. My kids need their dad. I would hope that he'd be a little more sympathetic to me. It just seems these last few months have been torture. It's hard not to think that the stress of moving "jarred" Tyler's Type 1 Diabetes. That's when the behaviors started. I can't say it's Dan's fault 'cause it's not. I just want a husband that is nice to me more than upset with me.

Sunday, February 28, 2010

Back in Black

So I haven't done this in awhile...oh who am I kidding? Actually in years! And since Tyler's diagnosis...by golly...I have a lot to say cause I have a lot to think about. I'm doing this more so I can put to "paper" what my brain is thinking.
I HATE diabetes. It's evil and mean and I wouldn't wish this upon anybody. And...why were questioning everything...why Tyler??? Why does it have to be him? Don't I have enough worries in life? Why would my Heavenly Father give this burden to such a young child? He has amazed me so far.